With his back to the other, Nicholas stood deep in thought. He absentmindedly released his mentor's grasp.
The elder turned to retire up the stone stairs. He regretfully let go of the young one's fingers.
Snapped from his pensive mood at the discontinued contact. A hint of panic rose in his voice, "LaCroix?" He suddenly swiveled to face the retreating figure.
"Yes, my child?" LaCroix halted his ascent to turn and gaze upon his new son.
Pain showed on Nicholas' face as he looked desparately to his master. "I...I can't let it go." Pausing, "The guilt, I mean." He glanced away again. His brow furrowed in confusion, frustration.
The ancient vampire slowly strode back down to re-join his creation. Irritance briefly flashed across his pale features. LaCroix had hoped the issue was resolved. Cuttingly, "Nicholas, if you continue to dwell on this...it *will* consume you." Regaining his composure, he smiled minutely as he gently placed his arm around his son's shoulder. His freed hand moved to re-lace with the fingers it had recently held. Pulling the lad into his embrace, LaCroix held his child. His lips grazed the forehead so near. "My poor...lost, boy." He soothingly uttered.
The blond flinched subconciensly at the intimate gesture. He was not repulsed, just startled by the unanticipated act. Tilting his head up, he looked into the haunting depth of his master's pale gaze, "Why?"
"Why...what, Nicholas?" The deep timbre replied calmly.
"Everything else appears to be changing, but why won't the pain go away? Why can't I seem to kill, this...'rightousness'?" The words issued in a pleading tone. He held the hand in his grasp tighter.
"I don't know." LaCroix evenly stated to the open face of his child. At the sensation of the firming clasp he tilted his head closer to his son's. He whispered, "But I will be here, for you...always. To assist you in conquering it...all." As he stared into the intense blue eyes, the tall form bent nearer. In a moment of improvidence, LaCroix' mouth abruptly claimed Nicholas'.
The untamed blond responded in kind. The spontaneity of the kiss was unexpected, for them both. Lips parted, eager tongues entwined. An ancient one in long denied desire. A young one in need, a new need; For reassurance, comfort, and a rapidly uncontrolable lust.
As delicious as it felt, it was all too unfamiliar, overwhelming. Nicholas sharply pulled away, gasping. His eyes glittered gold. "LaCroix?!"
A yellow hazed sight also withdrew, to look at him in return. Grinning slightly, "Yes? My dear one."
"What has happened to me?!" The young man's tone demanded. "What have you done?"
"Nothing, my boy." Stepping back, "You wish to experience and feel nothing more than what is already present in you, albeit hidden in some forgotten rescess of your mind. The 'change' has just brought it all to the forefront." Pausing, "The kiss *was* mutual...true? Did you not enjoy it? Or had I read your response incorrectly." A hint of sarcasm edged into the older vampire's words. He smiled in icy charm.
"Damn you!" Nicholas tried to draw farther away, refuting further contact.
LaCroix caught his son in his attempt to retreat. He pulled him close once more, catching his eye. In a restrained hiss, "I am already, damned...or so I have been told." His dark nature threatened to rise. He took a moment to quell his anger. "Now hush, Nicholas. Calm yourself. You are disturbed and perplexed, and not at me. Your inability to discard your lingering mortal guilt and self blame, among other things, is at fault." His pallid arms enclosed the frightened, angry lad.
Who turned away.
"Look at me..." The firmly spoken tone worked its way into Nicholas' mind. Through the vampiric link recently forged between the two.
Reluctantly, a dismayed gaze peered back up, into the other's pale blue eyes.
The stoic form paused a moment to harshly grab his new one's chin. Forcing him to focus on his words. LaCroix continued, "Your will is much stronger than you perceive, Nicholas. The desire for exsistence burning inside you will outlast any, uncertainties, you currently entertain."
"But...I am, afraid..."
"Of course you are." The elder benignly released the other's cool face. "That is to be expected. As I stated before." Long fingers casually trailed along the silken ivory neck, "Give it time." LaCroix leaned in to kiss the honeyed lips once more. He was rewarded again with a sweetly returned oral caress.
Nicholas drew away slowly. He looked up in adoration and apprehension to the man who had now become such a vital part of his new life. A multitude of feeling and passions coursed through his veins. Hushed, "I've tried, I have. I...just can't release it..." He trailed off, still in doubt.
LaCroix, keeping his beloved ensconced, "I know, mon amour. But I ,we, have an eternity. To try to teach you. To show you how to rid yourself of the, pain...burden, of the mortal bonds you seem so determined to wear. Come now, join me. Let us begin more of your...lessons." LaCroix released his protege from his cool embrace and took both of the child's hands in his. He turned to lead the young one up the stone stairway. For them to retire, together.
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